I was suck in from the very first meeting by the lake. But that ending, that fucking ending, that giggle ? Does that mean she still sick?Whyy? don’t let her be sick any more !!! I’m not accepting that!!!!! I endured it, praying till the end until they found their happy ending. This whole book is so overwhelming, gut wrenching devastating. If all that happen to me fuck, I want to feel fucking numb. Reading through her words putting my self in her shoe, sometimes i feel like I am her i could be her if given the same life fuck up events happens. Her whole life is a tragedy, it’s not her fault but I feel for her, I understand her craziness, I understood her confusion and I empathise with her numbness. Why do they have to suffer so much along with Suzanne. I cried for Z, I ache for for Mack and both Kayla, I was deeply sadden for Marcus. Every time that happen my heart breaks for Z. I feel like slapping her every single time she pushed Z away and runs for Mack. At some point I feel like giving up on Suzanne.
I feel exhausted, for Z, for fighting his happy ever after. At some point I did believe Marcus was right in saying loving Suzanne is exhausting. I cried for a very single pain you endure. Z you are a saint !!!!! I love you ! I give you 10 fucking star for the boy friend of the year. Why can’t it be easy?! why can’t Suzanne be well ? why can’t she just be better ? I was so happy when the second book was announced ! Suzanne is alive !! she’s alive and after all they went through they deserve a happy ever after!! but why why why why they have to endure so much more pain ?! (this and may be the child called it) I need a long hug to recover from this. It is one of the hardest book i read so far. I don’t know how to describe how utterly devastating & heartbreaking this book is.
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